There IS a “WE” in “wedding”, damn it.

While I am a bride documenting this hellish journey of planning our wedding, let me re-iterate that I do, in fact, normally hate weddings and planning them.

Here is my biggest beef with wedding planning: it’s sexist.

Now, I’m normally not a hardcore feminist, but the modern wedding really grinds my gears. Every time I pick-up a wedding magazine: What dresses the BRIDE should wear! On TV: Rich BRIDE Poor BRIDE. Wedding conventions: Only BRIDES may enter for free. Today, I was absolutely infuriated when an email blast for a gift registry arrived in my inbox with the title: “BRIDAL & Gift Registry Event”. 

Why is the modern wedding always marketed as bride-centric? Why do people say that it’s “HER day” and not “THEIR day”? Why do we always forget the groom? To argue this even further, why do we always assume that the wedding market should only appeal to brides of heterosexual couples? Many places have made the fantastic leap of legalizing gay marriage now… what about homosexual couples? Can’t they feel the love too? 

With all the attention being placed on brides, it makes me feel… well… insulted. I don’t think it’s fair to market the wedding as the perfect excuse for women to put on the veil and the white dress, walk down an aisle, wear a diamond ring and act like a princess. Having ovaries doesn’t automatically make me that much of a flake to realize that a wedding should be a celebration of TWO people and THEIR decision to make the commitment to spend the rest of their lives together.

The idea that the other party is seen as a passive accessory to the bride is incredibly backwards. Mr. Zombie is very much involved in planning our wedding. He is always present and ready to offer his two cents in any decision making involved with our planning process. After all, he is just as an important part of it as I am. There would be no wedding if he wasn’t there to be a part of it. 

So, wedding vendors and marketers who want my attention, do me a favour? Please don’t overlook the “WE” in “wedding”, K? Thank you.    

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